More Mallorca madness.....

Life here on Mallorca does not get any more sane! After almost four years I am used to the 'quirky' nature of some of the aspects of living on this island, but every now and again I get a sharp reminder of just how nutty this place can be!
So it was last Friday night when I went with a gang of chums to Calvia village to take part in the Nit di Foc - or Night of Fire! I had warned some of my chums who were here on their holidays from the UK to expect the unexpected, wear clothes that they didn't mind getting trashed, and to use ear plugs if they were averse to loud noises, but I don't think they took me seriously. In particular one of the sons, a fourteen year old who was determined to unimpressed by everything, was in for a surprise!
Of course the fiesta was late getting going - everything takes longer than you expect on Mallorca - so it was well after 11pm when the drums started somewhere off in the distance and the first fireworks began. 'Is that it!' muttered the teenager, 'Have we waited all night for a just a few fireworks?' ...he was still unimpressed.Then he got the surprise which I knew was coming! A demon appeared from nowhere wearing a truly scary mask and carrying a screaming firework wich showered red hot sparks everywhere. The teenager began to quake!
The Nit di Foc, or Carrefoc, is an ancient Mallorca traditional fiesta which involves people dressed as demons carrying fireworks and tridents of flames accompanied by loud, insistant drumming. If you have never experienced it before it scares the beejeebers out of the stoutest heart! By the end of the parade through the town the 'teenager' was a quivering wreck and his mother was sniggering under her breath After the parade everyone headed to the town car park to cool off at the foam party!' My son thinks he's so hard...thanks for proving he's still a little boy really!' Here I had a little run in with one of the demons! He decided it would be funny to steal one of my flip flops. Clearly he had no clue he was dealing with a Scouser! I got it back and he even gave me a hug and a kiss...not such a scary demon after all! Naturally we all got very wet but at 21 degrees celcius it doesn't really matter. A great night was had by all and I'm sure my friends went back to the UK with some memories that they will never forget. You don't have to be mad to live here on Mallorca - but it sure does help!

Not so long ago ballroom dancing was a bit naff! It was all sequins and tight pants in Blackpool tower with Angela Rippon and a dis-spirited crowd of blue-rinsed OAPs sipping sherry. Not so any more! Ballroom dancing is now sexy, glamorous, big business and a Saturday night telly ratings winner!
Ever since I got roped into dancing in a competition for charity at Pickles Dance Studio in Magaluf earlier this year I have been hooked! I am now a massive fan and if I don't get to swirl around the dancefloor with Ian Pickles I really, really miss it! So when I heard that a chum of mine was coming to the island with one of the professional dancers from the BBC's 'Strictly Come Dancing' programme I was excited to meet him and talk tango.
Ian Waite has been a dancer since he was 10 years old. By the age of 14, he had completed all his grades and won almost every competition that he had entered. He went on to the open circuit where he achieved international success by becoming the European Youth Latin American Champion. He competed all over the world, representing England in many world and European championships. He is also 6 foot 4, drop dead gorgeous and a thoroughly nice bloke!.
On the TV show he danced with Denice Lewis, Mica Paris, Penny Lancaster and performed an unforgettable tango with Zoe Ball. So far I have only managed a sangria-shared salsa with him after a rather boozy night out with chums in Palma. However, he is here for a few days yet so I live in hope of showing him my waltz contra-check before he goes. Zoe who? Look out Ian the Penn Pasa Doble is coming to get ya!

Just like Grand Mama Mia used to make!

Continuing the theme of Italians, let me introduce you to Salvatore. He is a Sicilian straight out of Hollywood casting. If you wanted someone to play a restaurant owner in a remake of the 'Godfather' you would look no further than this larger-than-life character.
Salvatore owns and runs the pizzeria and 'ristorante' La Fornace da Salvatore in El Toro and makes the best pasta I have tasted this side of Florence. He insists that I greet him with a traditional Sicilian greeting which goes something like 'Bacco les mani...ahhhhh!' It means 'I kiss your hands' and the last bit has to be done with a dramatic raising of the hands into the air as if praying to the gods.
If you go to his restaurant the first thing you have to do is have a drink....of course...next you will get delicious bread balls (still warm...his grandmother's recipe) and an equally delicious dip. I could go on and wax lyrical about the lasagne, the wines and the Amareto but I am getting hungry. Suffice to say if you want the best Italian meal on Mallorca pop down to see Salvatore in El Toro and say Laura sent you ...ahhhhhhh!

Deafening Countryside!!

Before I start let me make something very clear - I am a big fan of concrete! Being born in Liverpool, an industrial town if ever there was one where the only green space was the local corporation park, I have never really bought into the idea that the countryside is the best place to be. I appreciate that some rural areas, especially here on Mallorca, are stunningly beautiful to look at, but I have no desire to get any closer to them than a car window or the balcony of nice hotel!
Another myth is the 'peace and quiet' of the countryside. Have you ever tried sleeping in a tent? The ambient noise is deafening! Various wild (and domestic) animals bleating, crowing and bonking. Not to mention the dawn chorus which is really a dawn cacophony when the decible level goes off the scale! No, taking all things into consideration I would much prefer to snuggle down under the flightpath of Palma airport than spend a night in a field.
So it was, with some trepidation, that I ventured away from my home to a more lush and wild part of the island this weekend. I had my reasons! I was being tempted by the promise of several Italians. I feel another explantion may be needed here! Ever since my father inexplicably named me Laurentia (no one else has been called that in any school in Liverpool before or since!) I have had a strange facination with anything Italian. I am firmly convinced that I lived in Florence in a former life, I love pasta, chianti, Leonardo da Vinci, and the sound of the Italian language is enough to make me dribble in public.
So when Diane Foden, Luna Radio's correspondent in Soller, told us on Friday's breakfast show that there were lots of Italian men wondering around her home town taking part in an International Folk Festival I didnt need any more encouragement to jump in my car and head for the hills!
It didn't take long to track down the Italians. They were the cool dudes in designer sunglasses carrying accordians and chating up women! Soon they struck up a jolly tune and sang...in Italian...fabulous! But it wasn't long before they were drowned out by the drumming of the the Korean contingent and their large drums! Infact the group of charming little Korean girls were soon stealing hearts with their ever-smiling faces and graceful dancing. Just as we all got used to the unusual sound of of a steady Asian beat filling the square, it was joined by an African beat as a load of bongos started up from another team close by. Things were getting really noisy by now! If you know Soller you will now that there is a an old tram that travels from the town to the port. It passes right through the main square and at this time of year it is packed with happy holiday makers. Well the poor tram driver was having 'one of those days'! Not only could he not drive his tram through the crowd, he couldn't even make his horn heard above the dim of the Italians, Koreans, Africans and assorted nationalities who were drumming, singing, strumming and dancing in an orgy of exotic sound.
After about two hours I suspected my ears were about to bleed so I made my excuses and left, reluctantly saying 'ciao' to my new Italian friends. Surprisingly it was not them, but the delightful Korean ladies who left a lasting impression on me. They were so sweet, and smiley but give them a pair of drumsticks and they turned into creatures resembling Animal from the Muppet Show!
I had a great time in Soller and will never forget the sights...and the sounds...of the International Folk Festival. However it was a relief to get back to the relative peace of a radio studio with only loud pop to disturb me!!

AN AMAZING MAN!

Dr Michael Stoma is an amazing man! By day he treats and heals people at his practise in Portals village. By night he is working on the computer for hours organising help and relief for people in deparate need through his charity Mediterranea. Over the past 14 years he and his wife have saved untold numbers of lives without seeking praise or recognition for their work.
He won't sing his own praises so I (and Luna Radio) will do it for him! Luna has been proud to support Mediterranea in any way it can. Sometimes it feels like we do too little but every little helps.
Michael sent me this update today:

1)We have nearly finished building the new dining hall, the kitchen and the bathrooms in the Yeka school. (Ethiopia)
2)The new kitchen in the Abugida school is nearly finished and the kitchen space within the main building has now been turned in to a new class room as parents were begging for us to set up a primary school class for their children who were supposed to go to primary school (where they would not get fed). We found it impossible to say no, specially as we had the space on the premises.
3)We are now seriously studying and getting estimates re building costs to build a home for the children whose parents are going to die in the future. We would start with small modules for 10 children and one mother figure. We want the children to grow up with a family like environment.
Modules would be added on according to need.
4)With the starting of first year primary, the taking on of the Yeka school and the few new children that have crept in under the door we will be feeding 3 meals a day to 300 children as from September.
5)The famine is real, Victoria has seen it ands it is only beginning.
Those large bio fuel driven cars in the states are now classified not by horse power but by hearse power. "How many children do you do to the mile?" is the in question.
Still Mallorca continues to try to make the world a better place.

Thank you Michael for reminding us how lucky we are and how much we still need to do to help!

CHARITY NIGHT RAISES OVER 2K!

A big 'CONGRATULATIONS' to everyone who took part in the charity night in Magaluf last week. The event raised an amazing

2,000 euros plus for the Allen Graham Charity 4 Kidz. The money will go towards creating a 'Halfway House' for abused and abandoned young adults who have nowhere to go when they have to leave homes like the Llar de Menors in Palma.

Everybody gave their time and talents free so well done to Tracy Furniss and her team who created the costumes, Mike Jones who gave a great Elvis performance, John Mesma the hypnotist. Fifi Lamour and the lovely Fimme who danced to 'It's Raining Men' with me, Jason, Steve, Jeff, Anthony, Mike and Julian who did a brillaint 'Full Monty' and last but by no means least the gorgeous Matthew (pictured with me...he's the one with the hat) who gave all us ladies some lovely memories to take home!

It really was a fun night with everyone getting into the spirit of the event. Thanks to the hundreds of people who turned out on the night to support the performers and the charity. There were even one or two famous faces in the audience (thanks Caroline Corr for coming!) The demand for another such evening is such that there is a rumour that there may be a repeat performance around Christmas - complete with tinsel and mistletoe placed in strategic positions!

GET EM OFF!!!!!

A quick update on the progress of the strippers getting their kit off for charity! Practise is going well and they are now at the (un) dress rehearsal stage. The six brave volunteers will be stripping down to the bare minimum (literally) next Friday at Heaven nightclub in Magaluf. Normally a venue where young ladies flash the flesh it will be nice to turn the tables for once and see some male muscle exposed. (Although I am not sure if muscles come into it in this case).
In an unexpected development I find that I will be dancing as well on the night with a gorgeous male stripper! Not sure how that happened! Someone asked me if I would and before I had time to think about it my mouth had volunteered.
So if you want to see me and Fifi Lamore ripping the clothes ofa very tasty bloke then join us on friday 11th July at Heaven (it will be for us!!!) Tickets are 25 euros and the money goes to the Allen Graham Charity for Kidz! The things I do for charity!

Twice a Year is Ample!

There are few (if any) things more important than good friends. That is why I was delighted this week to welcome two very good friends of mine to Mallorca and to the radio station. Chris and Polly Best have been my chums for over ten years and although we dont see each other very often, when we do...well you know what it is like with true mates you just pick up where you left off.

Chris is an extrordinarily talented broadcaster who presents the breakfast show on Smooth FM in the north west of England. Over 700,00 people tune in every morning to listen to him and he has the highest listening figures in the region. We used to work together on Century Radio in Manchester too many years ago to remember and it was a real pleasure to sit opposite a microphone from him again on Luna radio. (and if you were awake one morning at 3am...yes that was him under the influence of a little brandy having fun playing Lynard Skinner!)

To celebrate the occasion of their visit I cooked! Now let me make it very clear that I do NOT cook. Well, twice a year a do - mid summer and at Christmas - so it was time to get chopping onions and do my speciality..lasagne! This is the one thing that I do very well (actually I do two things very well but the other I cannot mention in a blog!). My lasagne has even been praised by a real Italian so it must be good!

After sweating several hours in the kitchen on one of the hottest days of the year it was ready and 8 people ate and enjoyed it. As far as I know none of them had to be admitted to hospital or spent the next day in the bathroom so I call that a success!

Mallorca weekends are even worse!

If a week on Mallorca is a long time...the weekends are even longer! Last weekend I found myself playing snooker with two top sportsman, dressed in a long frock for a posh dinner and kissing stangers after Spain won a major football tournament for the first time in 44 years.

My mum is addicted to snooker! Even Coronation Street has to make way when there is action on at the Crucible. So imagine her surprise when, minding her own business in Liverpool, she got a call from one of her heroes Jimmy White! He threatened to come round for Sunday lunch and she almost fell off her chair!

Jimmy and fellow snooker star Steven Lee where on the island to do an exhibition match and Luna radio promoted the event. Both players were great fun (despite losing a match to a twelve-year old local whizz kid called Ben!) and they had such a great time that they have both promised to come back soon.

Saturday saw an unusual event. I actually wore a dress!..and a long red one at that! The occasion was the annual summer bash for the Rotary Club of Calvia when the new president takes over his post. This year will be an exciting one with Edward Ingram at the helm and Luna radio is proud to be one of the official sponsors and supporters of this club, (which is the only English- speaking branch of Rotary in Spain.)

It was a real posh bash at a top hotel with a delicious meal and I was invited to sit at the new President's right hand side which was a great honour. Together the Rotary Club of Calvia will raise money for charities both here on Mallorca and elsewhere in the world. For more details have a nosey at http://www.rotaryclubcalvia.com/.

Sunday night Cinderella turned back into a pumpkin! The dress was back on the hanger, replaced by jeans and football shirt for Spain's clash against Germany in the euros 2008 final. Now there was no doubt about where my loyalities lay here! I have chosen to make Spain my home and Espana was written on my chest as I headed to my favourite secret bar to watch the match with some locals. I hate to brag but I predicted the correct score in the sweepstake and made the point that the only goalscorer on the night, Torres, plays for Liverpool! When the final whistle blew the whole island went completely bonkers....and for the first time in 44 years the drinks were on the house! What happened after that all a bit blurred.........